This will be my first rant since starting my blog but certainly not my last. Oh, how I love to rant. This is a little more general and less personal than some of my blogs but it still makes my feelings perfectly clear.
I fear I may irk some readers with this so please remember it’s just an opinion piece and try to remain unirked😊
Let me start with the Matron Saint of having ones Womb Watched, the lovely Ms Jennifer Anniston. Ever since she shot to fame during her time as one of the stars of, 90’s TV hit Friends, tabloids have spent the ensuing decades speculating as to when she would finally grace the world with their well-earned baby Anniston.
The tabloids have announced her pregnancy so many times it seemes they think they would know before her…like she’d invite the paparazzi along for her first ultrasound.
The recently married, 47 year old, was subjected to another round of tabloid speculation when she was photographed on private property sporting a belly full of lunch in a bikini. Her press agent even issued a press release eschewing the “bump-patrol” and their vicious prying.
Is no woman safe from this sort of this constant speculation? I don’t have children and I don’t owe anyone an explanation but you wouldn’t believe how often I’ve been asked about it.
I have friends who have been trying for years to conceive with no success. I have friends who barely have one child before they’re being asked about the next. Mothers are judged for having only children while those who choose to have multiple babies are also judged. In general, as women, we’ve all been haranged, often by strangers or acquaintances, about where we stand in relation to the birthing process.
If one should decide children are not wanted. Ever. One will likely fight off people telling one to, “just give it time, settle down and soon enough you’ll be normal and want babies”.
Some families start young and as long as both are consenting adults with reliable income who am I to judge? Quite frankly, who are we to judge the teen who gets pregnant and her world turns upside-down? Who are we to ogle at the young pregnant woman and eschew the woman who dares to have a child after 40. Who makes these asinine rules ? Like if you haven’t had children you must have fertility issues and if you do have fertility issues they might pat your hand lightly and say softly, “just give it time dear. If it’s meant to be it will be.”
“Just give it time dear,” can often sound like a bloody broken record.
Comments about who’s pregnant and who’s not and why they should or shouldn’t be often cause hurt and shame to the woman and her partner. Speculation about what’s taking place in another woman’s Womb isn’t the business of anyone but Mom and possibly her partner or surrogates.
I know I’ve been sucked in before and speculated here and there but I need to stop. Society needs to stop. This preoccupation with reproduction only causes hurt, shame, guilt, and sadness. Bringing children into the world is important and joyous but there are other destinies too and they’re equally important. Let’s celebrate them all!
So please, unless expressly asked, leave it alone. You’ll know when you’re meant to know. It’s not your Womb to raid.